2012 movie review
For all of you guys or gals out there waiting for the review, here's some of the best reviews on the net available
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" 2012 not very good point of view review from IGN .com from patrick kolan "
2012 AU Review
Oh, it's a disaster alright.
by Patrick Kolan, IGN AU
Australia, November 2, 2009 - We haven't laughed so hard in a long time. The latest global disaster movie from director Roland Emmerich (Independence Day, The Day After Tomorrow) throws so much stupidity at you in such rapid succession that it's practically a torrential cliché-maelstrom; the kind of bloated, silly cinematic disaster that is so unintentionally hilarious that actually flips over and becomes a redeeming factor.
California is collapsing into the earth; if it isn't massive debts and raging fires, it's subterranean magma flows caused by (and don't quote us on the science behind this, but here goes...) solar flares casting out neutrinos at the Earth, heating its core and causing massive geological disruptions, plate shifts and fault line earthquakes.
Of course, the United States eats it first – but there's a secret contingency plan in place to protect the wealthy and privileged as society stands on the threshold of complete annihilation. Naturally, a good-hearted geologist and scientific advisor to the President, Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor, who puts in a good performance under the circumstances), stands up to the corruption and appeals to the President (Danny 'I'm gettin' too old for this s**t' Glover) to make the right decision.
Click above for the latest 2012 trailer.
John Cusack, playing a Richard Dawkins-esque author and limo driver, gets caught in the middle of the unfurling conspiracy as he drags his disaffected kids on a camping trip and ends up jumping security fences, wandering into a mysterious steaming lakebed and trampling through the middle of the governmental operation. Now that's responsible parenting in action.
Cue the rollicking silliness. You know those scenes that play out in every action movie made since 1980? The ones where the bus jumps the broken bridge? Or a man falls over the edge and everyone thinks he's dead—but it's okay because a single hand suddenly appears, clinging to the cliff? Or how about the plane that's trying to escape from an explosion and gets enveloped in smoke – only to come bursting out with impossible speed? What about the eleventh-hour miscalculation that results in the timer speeding up towards impending disaster? Then there's the grandpa with regrets, the 'ultimate sacrifice' guy, the wormy scientist who makes good, the noble daughter who outlives the father, the divorcee who falls back in love, the evil rich dude, the ethnic stereotype village, the holy man on the mountain, the beauty queen with the handbag dog, the dude with two day's pilot training who must repeatedly fly everyone to safety at street level, through a collapsing city? What about the obligatory heroic kid, or the water escape scene, the tacked-on happy Hollywood ending where it's all sunshine and laughing and nobody really feels too remiss about the death of 5.9 billion people?
And that's not even the half of it. Seriously. It goes on and on like this, piling on so much rehash that you will laugh. You can just sit there, switch off and let it wash over you like action-porn. In fact, perhaps that's exactly what 2012 is – the rebirth of action for the sake of action. To describe 2012 as the best 'rollercoaster-ride-with-a-story-attached' is about as much praise as we can muster for this production.
Look out, kids-- he's got the CRAZY EYES.
Cusack, who we maintain is charming and a talented fellow when given the right material (think: Grosse Pointe Blank or The Thin Red Line), maintains low gear the whole way through. His strained relationship with his ex-wife (Amanda Peet, looking painfully skinny) gets the same going-over that you've seen countless times. It has all the emotional sincerity of a daytime soap opera, but you won't care – you'll be too busy reeling after watching Chinooks transport elephants and giraffes over mountainous snowfields after gazing in stupefied awe as Cusack and company bail out of the back of a plane inside a Bentley and onto the tundra.
A special call out to Woody Harrelson who plays an unhinged conspiracy nut with absolute conviction. Harrelson hams it up so much that he almost points towards 2012 actually being the 'Mars Attacks' comedy that it's desperately trying to avoid. Golden.
The real tragedy is this: 2012's production cost an estimated $200-odd million dollars. What's worse, it'll probably make that money back, spawning a hackneyed sequel called 2013. And if there aren't aliens, dinosaurs, transforming robots and Will Smith in there, we'll be bitterly disappointed.
So bad that it's good again, 2012 comes from the same school of film failure as Michael Bay's Transformers 2 – only, Roland Emmerich plays far more with sentimentality which softens the blows, whereas Bay just beats you upside the head for two hours until you're spinning and kind of nauseous. Terrible; wonderfully terrible
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BIG FAT SPOILER
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So basically all the rich people on the planet secretly build a bunch of spaceships to get the hell out of here before we’re all killed by the Mayan god. Cost: $1 billion per seat on the ships. Cusack and his family try to get to China, where the spaceships are taking off from. That’s basically the plot of the movie: Cusack and co. trying to get to China to…do something, I guess. Although not much of anything. The main action in the movie is Cusack and family getting in planes and barely taking off before a deadly cloud of Apocalypse reaches them as they make their way to China. This happens three times in the movie. Very creative setpieces we’re talking about here.
Have I mentioned the ease with which suicide can be committed these days?
The redeeming factor, of course, will be some cool shots of tsunamis destroying shit and skylines crumbling from earthquakes. But I guaran-fucking-tee you there’s some much cooler disaster movie scripts filled with interesting ideas and characters sitting unproduced on Hollywood shelves. They just weren’t written by a German guy who’s delivered a string of profitable mediocrities
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from -http://www.cc2k.us/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1364
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another review but this one's talking more about roland emmerich.
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Roland Emmerich’s up to his familiar old ways – “My films are bigger, louder and splashier than yours are!” and while that may be true, it doesn’t make them good or worthy.
Emmerich has never been able to get out of his own way in making films – he requires jothing less than total annihilation of earth. They’re about sound, fury and shallow anthology storylines that signify nothing much. His overused End of Days scenario is as tired as this film is long; he has nothing to say that he didn’t already sayd in Godzilla, 10,000 B.C., Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow.
Disaster epics are so mid- nineties, the golden era of CGI, when computer geeks found ways to blow up the earth realistically and paved the road for a decade long string of high octane, low sense assaults on audiences. Emmerich was responsible for many – as producer or director and cpycats were plentiful. A partial list of interchangeably formulaic disaster films includes Deep Impact, Executive Decision, Dante’s Peak, Volcano, Armegeddon, and Perfect Storm – all triumphs of computer imaging.
But that was then and this is now.
These days, audiences are sophisticated and unnnshockable, well beyond that CGI gee whiz phase. A mobile phone can do everything but wash the dishes, so blowing up the California coastline or flooding China doesn’t really amount to much.
The disaster epic genre hasn’t been in its grave long enough to be of nostalgic interest, and yet, someone spent $265M to get 2012 made. Even the stars are from the mid-nineties - Jon Cusack, Amanda Peet and Danny Glover.
The effects are exciting for the first hour or so, but they begin to grate on the nerves - too much, too many, and too little relief. The storylines are formulaic and predictable –everything that happens you know will happen; every cliché in the book is here. The audience’ intelligence is severely underestimated. But maybe audiences that weren’t around to see movies in the disaster era may take a shine to this slick, weather gone wild porn.
Natural disasters are all well and good, our most troubling challenges at this moment in time are man made – economic collapse, wars in the Middle East, terrorism, crazed shooters, global warming, sex addicted talk show hosts and fights in swine flu innoculations lines. Nature running amok all by herself is really not on our Top Ten Worries list these days. Who has time? And as we have established, we already did that.
We’re doing what we can to improve the environment; we’re trying to be more humane and inclusive, we put a black president into office and we run for the cure. Things have changed since Emmerich first hit us over the head and there is no reason to turn back.
A successful disaster movie should be a fun ride- this is anything but. It takes itself too seriously to amuse. There’s no comic relief and few authentic human moments – even though that excellent British actor Chiwetel Ejiofor tries mightily.
Even so, the film will make potsful of money and inspire yet another wave of computer created disaster epics. Emmerich allegedly has two more disaster films skedded, one about a train heading to destroy New York and another about an entity from space threatening the earth. Whatever.
FROM : http://www.monstersandcritics.com/movies/reviews/article_1512440.php/2012-Movie-Review
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MY REVIEW
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well basically if u have read all the big set of things u would have known that all of them are criticizing the film and not even one of them said that the movie was worth the $6 we paid or/and the time we spent,sure it had awesome effects and everything that could make ur stomach churn and all the things but then as i said it doesnt really have any storyline the movie's pace and infomation has alot of freakinly big gaps which kind of confuses us . i even rewatched the movie a second time just to try to have a chance at filling in the gaps. but well overall this is quite a diastaster movie with no storyline and the effects graphics sound and everything is awesome except for the lack of storyline which critics always want to find and praise about. so lets have a turn to the bright side. firstly the movie was action packed with almost everything one would expect from a diaster movie and the sound with all the jokes were kind of funny and okay so overall if u ask me ill give it a 8/10 and yeah my ratings are quite low to all you friends over there that's saying that i cannot have the right to say that as im not licensed or anything i dont give a damn! as all critics like to say - whatever-
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zhenwei
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my favourite parts.. * spoiler alert*
EVERYBODY GET INTO THE CAR
[all go in]
OH SHTY THE ENGINES ARE DEAD
[NOT AGAINN]
*everybody panic*
thinking.. holy shtt
* very noisy *
russian guy suddenly
say ...
"russian guy" EVERYBODY QUIET [RUSSIAN ACCENT]
"russian guy" BENTLEY ENGINE ON [ RUSSIAN ACCENT]
"BENTLEY COMPUTER THINGY" Ting"... [computerish Tinkk]
* whole cinema people * AHHAHAHAHAHhHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
* me * MUAHAHHAAH "Popcorn Flies"
*me * oh shty
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next part
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and yeah there is this cool compliation of what would happen if and what the movie is kind of based on this is a really cool website do visit it
http://www.informationisbeautiful.net/visualizations/2012-the-end-of-the-world/
and yeah despite my review i would recommend the movie to fellow friends and family as it is one big size action packed movie that will add adreline to your blood stream in a matter of seconds with some pretty funny jokes [that might make u laugh ur socks off that is if ur wearing socks, in my case i was wearing sandles only and so i laughed my sandles off ], so catch it and buy the DVD before 2012 when the world "ends"
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